So, as it is no surprise to me, I am not the one one feeling the struggle of everyday life getting me down. Maybe because it’s been a weird winter, the fact that the spring has been one extreme or another that as seemingly dragged on and on couldn’t have helped much neither. and maybe because there seems to be a world reaching the point in time where there seems to be so many changes in every single aspect, that it has become like a cyclone nearing a hurricane and the two combined creating this HUGE gigantic natural disaster. It feels like somehow I’ll walk down a street and find one of my lifeless limbs lying in a gutter or ditch before it even has had the chance to detach itself from my body.
I know it doesn’t make sense, but somehow, it seems to fit right in with everything else in this world. One thing is for sure. I am not who I used to be before New Year’s Eve 2012. It’s like someone or something has consumed my mind with ways to changing everything around me for the better. I’ve always been one to want what’s best for everyone and to aid them in any way I could, but now this has consumed my mind entirely. This drive to want to make a diference has totall thrown me out of cycle with what I’m most comfortable with and it’s not anything I’m used to. Oh, sure I’ve had my weeks where I felt I was going to change the world, but then I would grow tired and discouraged very quickly, so I wouldn’t disrupt my life, or anyone else’s for that matter, all too much. Now, though, now it seems like I have to stir the pot, shave the bubbles from the top so that the soup can really get cooking.
Wow, I sound like a really lost soul at this point. A person whom strives to just be known, but honestly, you can have the fame. I just want to know that it will all turn out okay in the end. I want to go to my grave knowing that I did everything possible to make the future more brighter than what we live through day to day. Not sure whether we’re coming or going to war. Unsure of where our next meal is coming from. Wondering which part of our health budget has been spent to fund some dinner or which rear end concocted idea for a new retreat has just forced thousand out of jobs security and which official will receive the money that have been invested into companies that have the option to just pull out of a deal any time they please taking with them everything to their employees’ names.
I certainly wouldn’t want any child to be subjected to this and anyone bringing a child into this world from here on out, should be examined thoroughly.
Please, tell me I am not the only one afraid for our future.